It's been a strange week.
It's dragged.
It's flown by.
It's been difficult.
It's been easy.
It's been sad.
It's been happy.
It's been frustrating.
It's been exhilarating.
I want it to be over.
It's not lasting long enough.
Is it the week?...Or is it me?
I don't know.
But I do know some things. I've been writing this while listening to a JFK speech given in the Mormon Tabernacle in 1963. He mentioned the resilience of the Mormon people to keep going on and in a short 100 years they went from a persecuted people subjected to violence and murder to a people whose voice and works is respected the world over.
The cynic in me said, "Psh. Respected? Sure by some, but they're not as vocal as those who still hate us and wish they could get away with murder."
Then I got a little chiding, "Ah Lindsey. Does that really matter? What do you know is true?"
And the basics of my testimony about my religion went through my mind. I know some people hate me and mine because of our beliefs. But that doesn't change the fact that what I believe is truth. This gospel is true. The work by those who have gone before me and those of us who work now is more than worth it.
Or more aptly put: "The Standard of truth has been erected; No unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing; Persecutions may rage, mobs may combine, armies may assemble, calumny may defame, but the truth of God will go forth boldly, nobly, and independent, till it has penetrated every continent, visited every clime, swept every country, and sounded in every ear, till the purposes of God shall be accomplished and the Great Jehovah shall say the work is done."-Joseph Smith, Jr.
I know that the work I am part of is important. I know that I am on the right path.
I am thankful for my testimony today. And for an ever merciful Father who won't give up on me.
What are you thankful for today?
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
There was a moment...
I've had two big moments this week that I'd like to share.
The first happened while out shopping for back to school stuff (beginning of the year excitement!!). We crossed paths with an older couple, the woman walking ahead of the man who had the cart. The man paused to exchange some pleasantries with my boys; it was very sweet. As we parted I heard the woman snap, "Norm! What is wrong with you?!" as he caught back up with her.
In that moment, I felt my heart break again. It happens from time to time when I think about the kinds of things that people suffer in this world. Especially the kinds of things suffered because of the actions of those closest to us.
A man stops for just a moment to chat with some young boys and that prompts the woman with him to say that something must be wrong with him??? How sad that people talk to each other that way:(
It made me think of how sad it must be to live in those kind of relationships and how neither person can be happy like that. Sad. Sad. Sad.
The next moment to share came yesterday while the boys and I were in Walmart. Two minutes after we got inside, a downpour started. Seriously, it was pouring down harder and in larger volume than I've seen in years. The rain pounded so hard on the roof of the store that one couldn't hardly hear anything but the roar and I had to raise my voice for the boys to hear me.
Now, weather stresses me out. All kinds but extremely peaceful. Wind, however slight, raises my blood pressure. Snow storms. Rain and thunderstorms. I get reminded easily of the damage weather can do and so any weather raises my stress level. Even being odd like that myself, I was still a little shocked as I observed the people around us in the store. No one seemed to notice or care. I stood with the boys in view of the door so we could watch the crazy rain for a few minutes before continuing shopping. No one really reacted. People leaving the store would pause for a second to realize it was rather wet outside then proceed to just run out into it. People entering the store shook their heads and immediately took on the look of "now what am I supposed to get here?" Barely acknowledging the severe downpour just on the other side of the door!
As we shopped and I kept getting distracted by the pounding on the roof, I noticed that no one around seemed to even realize that anything out of the ordinary was going on outside.
I must be crazy weird. I couldn't help but think worst case scenario.
What if those buckets just don't stop failing and we're stuck here for a while?...At least we're together and hey, there's food here.
I wish Bret was here. I hope he's okay.
I wonder if this was what it was like when the Earth was flooded. Did people just think it was another rainy day. When did they finally start to worry?
Oh my, what if we have a huge flood right now?
How am I going to get out of here without soaking the boys and myself?
What if this is how it ends? Last chance for me and the boys?
I tried to be reasonable, but these kinds of thoughts just kept coming. Luckily, the rain subsided while we were in the check out line.
But the realizations lingered.
This time is precious and short. Let's take advantage of it.
Have you had any shareable moments lately?
The first happened while out shopping for back to school stuff (beginning of the year excitement!!). We crossed paths with an older couple, the woman walking ahead of the man who had the cart. The man paused to exchange some pleasantries with my boys; it was very sweet. As we parted I heard the woman snap, "Norm! What is wrong with you?!" as he caught back up with her.
In that moment, I felt my heart break again. It happens from time to time when I think about the kinds of things that people suffer in this world. Especially the kinds of things suffered because of the actions of those closest to us.
A man stops for just a moment to chat with some young boys and that prompts the woman with him to say that something must be wrong with him??? How sad that people talk to each other that way:(
It made me think of how sad it must be to live in those kind of relationships and how neither person can be happy like that. Sad. Sad. Sad.
The next moment to share came yesterday while the boys and I were in Walmart. Two minutes after we got inside, a downpour started. Seriously, it was pouring down harder and in larger volume than I've seen in years. The rain pounded so hard on the roof of the store that one couldn't hardly hear anything but the roar and I had to raise my voice for the boys to hear me.
Now, weather stresses me out. All kinds but extremely peaceful. Wind, however slight, raises my blood pressure. Snow storms. Rain and thunderstorms. I get reminded easily of the damage weather can do and so any weather raises my stress level. Even being odd like that myself, I was still a little shocked as I observed the people around us in the store. No one seemed to notice or care. I stood with the boys in view of the door so we could watch the crazy rain for a few minutes before continuing shopping. No one really reacted. People leaving the store would pause for a second to realize it was rather wet outside then proceed to just run out into it. People entering the store shook their heads and immediately took on the look of "now what am I supposed to get here?" Barely acknowledging the severe downpour just on the other side of the door!
As we shopped and I kept getting distracted by the pounding on the roof, I noticed that no one around seemed to even realize that anything out of the ordinary was going on outside.
I must be crazy weird. I couldn't help but think worst case scenario.
What if those buckets just don't stop failing and we're stuck here for a while?...At least we're together and hey, there's food here.
I wish Bret was here. I hope he's okay.
I wonder if this was what it was like when the Earth was flooded. Did people just think it was another rainy day. When did they finally start to worry?
Oh my, what if we have a huge flood right now?
How am I going to get out of here without soaking the boys and myself?
What if this is how it ends? Last chance for me and the boys?
I tried to be reasonable, but these kinds of thoughts just kept coming. Luckily, the rain subsided while we were in the check out line.
But the realizations lingered.
This time is precious and short. Let's take advantage of it.
Have you had any shareable moments lately?
Monday, July 25, 2011
Snarky
Just call me Snarky McSnarkerson.
In the past ten years I've become quite the sarcastic cynic in my head.
It's not all the time.
The snarkiness in my thoughts tends to increase ten thousand fold as I approach a certain time of the month.
Which is the current state I find myself in.
I sometimes sell used but good condition items on a local news channel classified webpage.
Usually with great success.
Since the last time I've listed items, it seems that the buyers who look at this site are only looking to pay half of what used items are worth.
I can't tell you how many times I've gotten calls or emails in the last month asking if I'd sell one or more of my items for half of what I'm asking for it and then getting all uppity when I say no.
It's shocking!
Today- the straw that almost broke the snarky camel's back.
One woman emailed me last week about a kids' toy I've listed. It's in spectacular condition and retails for big bucks. I priced it at a quarter of it's original cost. She asked questions and I answered them (one of which being how low was I willing to sell it for (Do they really think I'm that dumb???)).
I didn't hear anything back and assumed she'd decided she didn't want it. Fine with me.
Until today...
...When I got an email from her telling me she was passing on my toy because she'd found one for such and such a low price that was twice as big as the one I'm trying to sell.
I stared at my computer for a few moments, looking at the computer like I look at my boys when they ask me for the twelfth time for a treat right before dinner (really?), and fighting back the snarky thoughts that I would love to share with a click of the reply button.
Oh, good fer you!
Gee, thanks for sharing.
Boy, am I glad you saved my email address to tell me that!
I'm still not lowering my price.
Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
In the end, I just deleted the email.
Then I sighed a big sigh because I can't call Bret about this yet and it's too rich not to share.
And then I smiled because I remembered I could blog about it.
So I did.
Except I'm fairly disappointed that you can't hear the tone of my voice as I write this and I'm hoping you can put in the right amount of sarcasm for yourselves; it's so much more entertaining that way...
And now I will go back to keeping my snarky thoughts to myself...as best I can...which isn't very good...curses.
In the past ten years I've become quite the sarcastic cynic in my head.
It's not all the time.
The snarkiness in my thoughts tends to increase ten thousand fold as I approach a certain time of the month.
Which is the current state I find myself in.
I sometimes sell used but good condition items on a local news channel classified webpage.
Usually with great success.
Since the last time I've listed items, it seems that the buyers who look at this site are only looking to pay half of what used items are worth.
I can't tell you how many times I've gotten calls or emails in the last month asking if I'd sell one or more of my items for half of what I'm asking for it and then getting all uppity when I say no.
It's shocking!
Today- the straw that almost broke the snarky camel's back.
One woman emailed me last week about a kids' toy I've listed. It's in spectacular condition and retails for big bucks. I priced it at a quarter of it's original cost. She asked questions and I answered them (one of which being how low was I willing to sell it for (Do they really think I'm that dumb???)).
I didn't hear anything back and assumed she'd decided she didn't want it. Fine with me.
Until today...
...When I got an email from her telling me she was passing on my toy because she'd found one for such and such a low price that was twice as big as the one I'm trying to sell.
I stared at my computer for a few moments, looking at the computer like I look at my boys when they ask me for the twelfth time for a treat right before dinner (really?), and fighting back the snarky thoughts that I would love to share with a click of the reply button.
Oh, good fer you!
Gee, thanks for sharing.
Boy, am I glad you saved my email address to tell me that!
I'm still not lowering my price.
Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
In the end, I just deleted the email.
Then I sighed a big sigh because I can't call Bret about this yet and it's too rich not to share.
And then I smiled because I remembered I could blog about it.
So I did.
Except I'm fairly disappointed that you can't hear the tone of my voice as I write this and I'm hoping you can put in the right amount of sarcasm for yourselves; it's so much more entertaining that way...
And now I will go back to keeping my snarky thoughts to myself...as best I can...which isn't very good...curses.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Five. Years.
In the grand scheme of things, five years is not that many.
Hardly a blip on the radar.
Even on a smaller scale, five years just isn't that long.
But my, how things can change in just five years.
In five years of my life I married, had a baby, graduated from college, bought a house, and had twins.
What a difference five years makes!
If one had taken a snapshot of my freshman year, then skipped ahead to take another snapshot five years later-
Shoot, even I would wonder if that was really the same person.
I'd like to say that five years from now the changes will be just as dramatic:
My children will be 11 (!!!), 8, and 8. Maybe there will be more.
All of them could be in school. Or maybe we'll be veteran homeschoolers.
I'll have finally figured out a system that will keep the house consistently clean and organized.
There will be an exercise routine I have successfully made habit.
I'll have an hour every day that I can spend in the scriptures.
There will be more than enough hours every day to accomplish what I need to and even what I want to.
No matter what I eat, my thighs will not get bigger.
Yeah...maybe my imagination is running a bit wild...
I don't know what life will be like in five years. I have desires for how it will be. I have directions to go and paths to follow that will take me to wonderful places with my family and personal growth.
But really, looking back on how quickly my life can change in five years I really can't pretend to even have a grasp of what life will be like for Lindsey five years from now.
Whatever it is- It's going to be AWESOME!
Hardly a blip on the radar.
Even on a smaller scale, five years just isn't that long.
But my, how things can change in just five years.
In five years of my life I married, had a baby, graduated from college, bought a house, and had twins.
What a difference five years makes!
If one had taken a snapshot of my freshman year, then skipped ahead to take another snapshot five years later-
Shoot, even I would wonder if that was really the same person.
I'd like to say that five years from now the changes will be just as dramatic:
My children will be 11 (!!!), 8, and 8. Maybe there will be more.
All of them could be in school. Or maybe we'll be veteran homeschoolers.
I'll have finally figured out a system that will keep the house consistently clean and organized.
There will be an exercise routine I have successfully made habit.
I'll have an hour every day that I can spend in the scriptures.
There will be more than enough hours every day to accomplish what I need to and even what I want to.
No matter what I eat, my thighs will not get bigger.
Yeah...maybe my imagination is running a bit wild...
I don't know what life will be like in five years. I have desires for how it will be. I have directions to go and paths to follow that will take me to wonderful places with my family and personal growth.
But really, looking back on how quickly my life can change in five years I really can't pretend to even have a grasp of what life will be like for Lindsey five years from now.
Whatever it is- It's going to be AWESOME!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Thankful Thursday
Life has been life lately [I was going to say a bit crazy, but isn't it always?] and I'm having trouble keeping up!
But yesterday, I took an hour to just be outside with the boys. I pushed them on the swings and watched them pretend to be Kung Fu warriors (we recently borrowed Kung Fu Panda from the library). We jumped on the trampoline together and had a lovely, summery time.
Al and Goose hopped off the trampoline to go play something having to do with firefighters and pirates in their fort. Jonz and I continued jumping.
With the little ones off, I feel some more liberty to bounce Jonz higher.
So I did.
He thought bouncing higher was so hilarious and awesome. He laughed, he squealed, he yelled with glee.
That hour with my boys was special and rejuvenating.
But ending it with Jonz been so entertained was priceless.
I am so thankful for moments like that amongst the chaos of life.
What are you thankful for today??
But yesterday, I took an hour to just be outside with the boys. I pushed them on the swings and watched them pretend to be Kung Fu warriors (we recently borrowed Kung Fu Panda from the library). We jumped on the trampoline together and had a lovely, summery time.
Al and Goose hopped off the trampoline to go play something having to do with firefighters and pirates in their fort. Jonz and I continued jumping.
With the little ones off, I feel some more liberty to bounce Jonz higher.
So I did.
He thought bouncing higher was so hilarious and awesome. He laughed, he squealed, he yelled with glee.
That hour with my boys was special and rejuvenating.
But ending it with Jonz been so entertained was priceless.
I am so thankful for moments like that amongst the chaos of life.
What are you thankful for today??
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Return
Sorry about the last couple weeks. My computer gave up the ghost.
Turns out that 4.75 years on a hard drive is the equivalent of 97 years for a human body.
It just stopped.
Cross your fingers for me that the PC peeps will be able to get the data off of it. They're taking their sweet time, but certain language they've used has made me think they have the data they just are in no hurry to copy it to the new hard drive we gave them for such purposes. Still, cross those fingers anyway please.
I've had this computer for four or five days and I still can't manage to type smoothly. *argh* New keyboards. I feel like I'm back in high school stumbling through a typing class trying to type the same word five times before it comes out right:)
Anyway...I've felt a little lost lately, not being regular in my weekly grateful writings.
I feel grateful, and I acknowledge that in my head often. But there's something therapeutic about writing it down and publishing it for "the world" to see.
It helps me (that took me three tries!) feel more peaceful. It helps me keep that peace when I come across things that threaten those feelings. It doesn't solve my problems or make the world a daisy-filled dreamland. But it does take the edge off my cynical mind and help me be more optimistic. It helps dramatically, I've noticed.
You should try it.
I'm determined to hop back on the train on Thursday and call this lapse a fluke summer thing.
Seriously, you should try it. It's good for the soul:)
Turns out that 4.75 years on a hard drive is the equivalent of 97 years for a human body.
It just stopped.
Cross your fingers for me that the PC peeps will be able to get the data off of it. They're taking their sweet time, but certain language they've used has made me think they have the data they just are in no hurry to copy it to the new hard drive we gave them for such purposes. Still, cross those fingers anyway please.
I've had this computer for four or five days and I still can't manage to type smoothly. *argh* New keyboards. I feel like I'm back in high school stumbling through a typing class trying to type the same word five times before it comes out right:)
Anyway...I've felt a little lost lately, not being regular in my weekly grateful writings.
I feel grateful, and I acknowledge that in my head often. But there's something therapeutic about writing it down and publishing it for "the world" to see.
It helps me (that took me three tries!) feel more peaceful. It helps me keep that peace when I come across things that threaten those feelings. It doesn't solve my problems or make the world a daisy-filled dreamland. But it does take the edge off my cynical mind and help me be more optimistic. It helps dramatically, I've noticed.
You should try it.
I'm determined to hop back on the train on Thursday and call this lapse a fluke summer thing.
Seriously, you should try it. It's good for the soul:)
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Thankful Thursday
Scriptures.
Prayer.
Family.
Peace in the midst of the unknown and frustration.
Goals.
Progression.
Bret.
New social circles.
I am thankful:)
What are you thankful for this Thursday??
Prayer.
Family.
Peace in the midst of the unknown and frustration.
Goals.
Progression.
Bret.
New social circles.
I am thankful:)
What are you thankful for this Thursday??
Friday, July 1, 2011
Fankful Friday
Sheesh!
I can't believe how bad I've been on Thursdays these last few weeks. Yesterday it didn't even occur to me that I needed to blog here.
It didn't last week, either. I remembered on Friday (like this week), but thought, "Ah, who cares anyway? I'll just do it next week."
But I didn't. So now I have to do another Fankful Friday.
Oddly enough, what I am thankful for this week is...people.
Yes, even considering my last post. I am thankful for people.
Bret. My wild, trying-to-run-around-outside-in-only-their-underwear, loud, and wonderful sons. My parents. My siblings (especially their wives!). Friends (you wish you were lucky enough to know the Newmans;)). Neighbors. Ward members. Cashiers who say, "Thank you so much for teaching your children manners!"
People can often be the source of frustrations, but mostly they are a source of joy and purpose.
WHO are you thankful for today?
I can't believe how bad I've been on Thursdays these last few weeks. Yesterday it didn't even occur to me that I needed to blog here.
It didn't last week, either. I remembered on Friday (like this week), but thought, "Ah, who cares anyway? I'll just do it next week."
But I didn't. So now I have to do another Fankful Friday.
Oddly enough, what I am thankful for this week is...people.
Yes, even considering my last post. I am thankful for people.
Bret. My wild, trying-to-run-around-outside-in-only-their-underwear, loud, and wonderful sons. My parents. My siblings (especially their wives!). Friends (you wish you were lucky enough to know the Newmans;)). Neighbors. Ward members. Cashiers who say, "Thank you so much for teaching your children manners!"
People can often be the source of frustrations, but mostly they are a source of joy and purpose.
WHO are you thankful for today?
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