Thursday, November 29, 2012

Thankful Thursday

It's been quite a crazy three quarters of a week.

Wednesday was the nuttiest.  Too much time spent in the van and in waiting rooms or scrambling to finish tasks before deadlines (yes, stay at home moms have deadlines, too).

In the packed time of Wednesday were many blessings.  They inspire my Thankful Thursday list today.  I am thankful for...

...a great school for Jonz to go to and his teacher's genuine smile.
...finding time to squeeze in a much needed haircut before the baby comes. family staying safe as we spent far too much time in the van going here and there via the interstate.
...patient twins who are so good in the car.
...a good dentist and his great staff.
...modern dental technology that makes the scariness and pain of fixing teeth much easier. awesome, brave, and obedient eldest son.
...that someone cancelled their appointments (for the next two hours) while I stood at the counter trying unsuccessfully to get appointments for Al and Goose, making it possible to not only get their teeth cleaned and checked before the baby comes, but without having to make another trip!
...The Muppets 12 Days of Christmas
...that the elevators being fixed at the women's center were not both out of order so I could get to my appointment at the top floor on time AND not out of breath.
...that my sister in law works in the same building and I could go to the appointment sans children.
...that I could negotiate my way from four remaining OB appts to TWO:)
...that I was told yesterday that since I have a scheduled c-section and am not a high-risk pregnancy this time (and since I have a cervix of steel that doesn't dialate) my remaining appointments are just blood pressure, measurement, and heartbeat checks.  This not only means that I don't have to have my cervix checked anymore, but that I don't have to find someone to watch Al and Goose during my appts (soooooo much easier!)., wireless internet, and a scanner.
...that people answered their phones (a rarity) allowing me to finish my RS responsibilities semi-quickly
...a fun evening with Bret's family
...Christmas movie time with my husband
...getting to spend so much time in these early years with the sweetest boys in the world (and their beautiful, innocent, shining eyes that I could stare at all day).

What are you thankful for today?

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Thank you

Yes, I missed Thankful Thursday on Thanksgiving.

But spending time with loved ones all weekend is much higher on the priority list than getting to my computer and writing a post.

And hey, I'm still full of gratitude.  And since I'm the main benefactor from this weekly endeavor of mine, I say my absence is totally justifiable.

Take that!

Anyway, I was just reading my posts from last December and had a moment that I thought I oughta share.

I seem to have forgotten that last holiday season was spent mightily sick.  Like, sicker-and-weaker-than-I've-been-in-years sick.  Most of the past Novs/Decs I've gotten something bad, but usually it's just my boys that get knocked out by viruses.  Last year, though, I got hit harder than I have in a while.  Stomach bug on Thanksgiving and the flu or a flu-like bug (which led to ear and sinus infections, of course) for weeks in December.

There was lots of "wo-is-us" in those posts, but also lots of recognition of tender mercies, too.

It was as I was reading one of the posts the thought came to me, "you're protected because of that."

In that moment, I thought of how little I understand of Heavenly Father's path for me.  I now readily believe it highly likely that I spent last holiday season so sick, along with my kiddos, so that this year (when we're getting ready to welcome a baby) we'd be stronger.  Though I didn't know it yet, Heavenly Father knew that this year I would be physically taxed creating a body for someone.  Getting sick is extra dangerous when pregnant.  Perhaps he was protecting me and the baby this year by training my body last year to fight off more viruses...Perhaps I'm off my rocker.  But I don't think so:)

And I realized that I have not been as thankful during times of sickness as I should be.

Sicknesses can teach us many things; like patience, trust, humility, service, charity, faith, and gratitude. 

But I realized...or more deeply understand tonight that each time we heal from an illness, our immune systems are stronger and that sometimes God uses that as a protection for us.

How many times has a previous sickness saved me major trouble/pain/heartache/etc. and I didn't even know it???

So thank you, Heavenly Father.  Thank you for protecting me and my loved ones.  And thank you for not getting upset with me when I whine and don't recognize what a great blessing you are giving me.

And now I just have to hope that he taught me that lesson tonight so I can more fully appreciate the next few weeks of health (knock on wood) and not so that I'm ready to get hit with another bout...

Hope you had a delightful Thanksgiving weekend!

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

For fun

Alternately titled: An overabundance of parentheses.
This picture is over a month old (yes, I'll take another belly shot...maybe in a couple weeks:)), but I thought I'd put it up for fun today.
What a difference eight weeks makes, eh?!

In non-cow news, I went out last night to run some errands (got a super cute little newborn outfit for Christmas!  Baby things are so sweet.) and got the regular bunch of comments and questions from passers-by and check out clerks.

Comments ranging from "wow, a month? but you look ready to pop" (yes...thanks for that observation; I am keenly aware of how long a month sounds, too) to "oh I can tell you're carrying a girl" (even though I carried my boys the same way and you've never seen me before...) to "Fourth?!..........." (I dare you to say something about my age or overpopulation.  Please, it would make this conversation so much more interesting!).

What can I say?  I'm a snarky person.  (You knew that about me, didn't you?)

My favorite, though (I'm getting to the non-cow part), was from a woman who was walking toward me, did a double take after she passed me and said, "Oh, you're pregnant?!?  I didn't even know until I looked at your belly.  You're just so skinny everywhere and that belly just pops straight out!"

Praises to you, dear woman. 

And because I'm feeling far too snarky right now, I'd better stop writing before I get myself in trouble.

Friday, November 16, 2012

That day I pretended Friday was Thursday

Yesterday was long and busy and once I was finally home with all my boys around me I completely forgot that it was Thursday and I had a post to write.

Gotta say, I like evenings like that.

But.  Because I started this tradition for myself, because the major holiday devoted to gratitude is just next week, and because I desperately need constant reminders of all I have to be grateful for- here's my Thankful Thursday post for this week.  I feel like I've gone deep with the last many, so this one is in simple and happy list form:)

A few things I am thankful for today:

-piles of leaves gathered in gutters underneath trees on misty mornings.
-trusting sons who still love me even though I take them to the doctor for shots
-the smell of snow
-nutella on graham crackers
-to finally be seeing progress on our rearranging projects in the house (it's been frustrating that the more I try to organize the more disorganized everything feels.  But everything's finally sliding into place, bit by bit:))
-the sight of the crib, now ready for our baby (this one is still a little surreal and unnerving, too;))
-a fixed dryer; I LOVE line drying our laundry, but this makes this so much easier (and I now I can do both!)
-Bret: my goofy, long-suffering husband with a smile that still gives me butterflies in my stomach.
-my firstborn, who reminds me so much of myself when he gets angry that something isn't going perfectly on the first try.
-the furnace
-loooooooooong showers

And what are you thankful for today?????????

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

I am not a cow.

FYI, while describing a true and aggravating struggle of mine- this post is meant to be funny.  So laugh:)

I'm large.

But I don't feel anywhere near in charge.

I have gained a grand total of 37 pounds thus far in the pregnancy.  Still shy of the 40 I gained the first time and the 56 I gained the second time.  But we've got the quickest weight gain weeks left to go and I feel huge.

It's a stupid struggle with vanity.  I know that.

I'm pregnant, not fat.  I know that, too.  This will end.  My body will return to a healthy weight.  And numbers don't even matter in this case of creating an entire human body. 

But that hasn't stopped the thoughts from coming into my head with more frequency in the past week-ish.

When I lean back on the couch and feel my legs start to fall asleep from constricted blood flow after a mere five minutes.  "Girl.  You huge."

When I walk past the large mirror in the bathroom.  "Gah!"

When I have to wake up fully and heave myself, grabbing onto the bed frame for an anchor, just to turn over to my other side.  When I limp and waddle my way to the mailbox.  When the 10th person in 30 minutes at church asks me how many days I have left in this pregnancy.  Whenever I see my hands.  Or my face.  Or my thighs.  Really any part of me between my eyes and my knees (excepting my elbows!). When I get dressed only to realize that I've outgrown another maternity shirt. 


"I AM NOT A COW!"  I tell myself this countless times a day.  I have done a much better job this time around of treating my body well- eating well, drinking plenty, keeping my feet up when possible, and though I have great room to improve in the exercising department- it's not hard to stay active in my life.  And honestly, I can see positive differences because of that.  My blood pressure has been "really great" says the nurse, whereas it's been high at the end of my previous pregnancies.  I don't have constant cankles yet (crossing my fingers they stay away altogether).  I do have "pregnancy face," but it's much less pronounced this time.  Sicknesses have been short-lived (knock on wood).

Despite the fact that I'm older (and I can feel it!), despite the fact that this is my third pregnancy and I'm bound to gain more, despite the fact that I feel healthier (body AND mind) than I have in years- I am excessively tempted to feel like a cow.

Most of the time I can pep talk myself away from that particular cliff.  But...lemme tell you tonight's tale...

The light in our garage has a motion sensor.  Every night I open the garage door, stick my head out, and check to make sure the outside door is shut and all lights are off in the cars before I lock the inside door.  The motion sensor is just to the left, on the same wall as the door.  It's a pet peeve of mine that I don't make that light turn on, especially when I just want to quick grab something out of the van.  As long as I stick close to the wall, it can't tell I'm in there and stays off. 

But tonight.  Tonight I heifered, I mean hefted! myself off the couch and pep talked my way to the garage about pregnancy, good health, and all that jazz.  I opened the door and stuck half my head out to see the outside door...and the light click on.

"Hang your head in shame, fathead."

I used to be able to get my entire body in and out of the garage without tripping that light.

Now half my head is all it takes.

*siiiiiiiigh*  BUT. I. AM. NOT. A. COW.

Nope.  Surrrrre aren't...

However, I will not deny that I am far too vain for my own emotional sanity...

Thursday, November 8, 2012


I'm feeling discouraged.

I've been on my feet for longer than I ought much too often this week, been paying for it for a couple days now...and still staying on my feet too much.  Braxton Hicks and seizing hips are the norm.  And that's discouraging.

The morning sickness ache is coming back in waves.  That's discouraging.

Mopping hurts (in what world does the easy task of mopping hurt?!?!).  Walking up the stairs leaves me winded and blood pounding in my head.  That's discouraging.

I'm slow.  I limp everywhere.  I can't do much of anything with efficiency anymore.  There are so many tasks I want to accomplish at home and at the end of the day, despite all the effort and time on my feet, they mock me in their unfinished state.  That's discouraging.

In its relaxed state, my face takes on an I-don't-care-about-anyone-but-myself expression.  I catch myself looking like I hate life when I notice people looking at me and I hate giving off that impression.  I don't hate life and truly, I'm fine.  But I can't seem to remember to smile just because anymore.  That's discouraging.

And finally, the elections this week have made it clear that America will never again be what it was nor what it was intended to be.  And that's very discouraging.

It occurred to me late Tuesday evening that the growing majority of American people remind me eerily of the members of the LDS church who want to change the Church and/or doctrine to better suit their wants.

I just don't understand why there are people who want to be part of an organization that is founded on things they vehemently disagree with.

If one thinks practicing homosexuality is fine or wants women ordained to the priesthood, why is one claiming membership to a church which so clearly states the opposite? 

I don't get it. 

But this is what I see is happening in my church.  And this is what I see is happening in my country.

The United States of America is populated by a majority that wants to change it. 

I don't get it! 

If one thinks that the federal government should control the states and give people everything they need just because they exist, why is one in the USA?  There are so many places in the world where the government does just that.  Why don't they go live the way they want to and leave my country be?  Why must they insist on forcing that change here?  Where am I left to live the way I want to once they succeed in changing America into just another bankrupt government.

Yep.  I'm discouraged.

But there is something that I take heart in since that realization on Tuesday.  Though it is likely that the majority will get the change they want here in America- try as they may, the like-minded members of my church will not.

I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  A church solidly founded on the gospel of Jesus Christ.  A gospel that has never and will never change.

No matter the amount of signed petitions delivered to Church Headquarters.  No matter the dissenting speeches made from pulpits, in classes, on blogs, or among neighbors.  No matter the immature mocking (or if it comes to it, persecution).  No matter the amount of people who decide to leave the membership and devote their lives to anti-Mormonism.

You can't change the gospel of Jesus Christ.  And you can't change His church.

I am so grateful for that immovable foundation in my life.  I am so thankful that I can trust in that.

And I'm grateful that even though I keep running into brick walls as far as my physical capabilities go versus my responsibilities and desires, life is currently simple enough that I can still catch some time with my feet up a few times a day. 

I love my helpful sons (even though 90% of the time their help is accompanied by whines:)).  I love my supportive husband.  I love my body for not completely giving out on me.  I'm thankful for a van to get my family places too far to walk.  I'm grateful for a lovely home that's serving us so well.  I'm grateful for my dishwasher.  I'm thankful for uneventful nights.  I'm thankful for the opportunity and priviledge to vote.  And I'm thankful for my membership in the Church.

What's a little discouragement now and then?  It's a good life.

What are you thankful for?

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Thankful Thursday

It's November!!

I am thankful for all the things I have to look forward to this month. 

Birthdays, holidays, wedding anniversary, breaks from school, fun seasonal activities with the boys, a month of gratitude, increased frequency of appointments to check up on the baby (which isn't fun, but it does make the pregnancy seem to go by a bit faster), colder weather, reorganization projects as we try to get ready for the baby to be here...

It's going to be quite a month.

And next month?  I'm having a baby:) Enter the surreal stage...

What are you thankful for today?

Quit it with the zombies

Here's something I've been thinking about for a while and am finally "verbalizing."

I find the growing craze and acceptance of all things zombie to be extremely annoying and disturbing. 

I just don't get it.  I understand the entertainment value in being scared, to a degree.  But beyond the fun in getting someone's heart to skip a beat or two...I just don't get it.

Why are more and more people okay with the gore, blood, and living dead junk?  Why do so many people find it funny?

It's not funny.  At all.  When did it become funny to disrespect life so much?

Because seriously, that's what it looks like to me- complete disrespect and disregard for the amazingness that is life.

It's just one more thing that is desensitizing people to cruelty.  Which, agree with me or not, leads to more nut-jobs committing more and more bloody, gory, cruel crimes against people.

Whatever, Lindsey.  No one is the same and I should allow people to believe what they want to and enjoy their own entertainment. 

Live and let live, right?

That would be fine by me.  As an adult, I have a firm grasp of reality and the ability to avoid things I don't like in most situations.  But my boys?  Not so much.  They're little, curious sponges soaking up all they can as they grow and try to understand the world around them. 

If we're going to live and let live, then I say get rid of those disturbing billboards advertising the haunted houses with larger than life pictures of bodies falling apart.  The ones my boys can't stop staring at and asking questions about as we drive past because it's one of those "does not compute" things they're trying to understand.  The ones that put disgusting images into their minds that love to come out in terrifying nightmares in the middle of the night when we'd like to be sleeping peacefully.

If we're going to live and let live, then quit displaying the disgusting Halloween masks right next to the children's costumes in the stores.

Quit putting the gory horror movies right next to the Charlie Brown Halloween specials DVDs. 
Quit dressing up the baby as the bloody spawn of your gory character for Halloween.
Quit putting on public zombie shows.

In other words, quit putting so many disturbing images in public that I can't get my kids away from and causing them to have more things to fear in their innocent world of naturally accepting everything as absolute truth.

In other words- I'm glad Halloween is over and more pleasant holidays are coming up.