Tuesday, July 30, 2013


Just for fun, here are some of my anthems.  The songs that run in and out of my head, depending on the situation.

My cleaning anthem

My you're-all-idiots anthem

My be-nice-Lindsey anthem

My I-don't-have-it-any-harder-than-everyone-else-so-deal-with-it-and-rock-it anthem

My my-boys-are-awesome anthem

My I-love-my-husband anthem

Bret, I want a "You and Me" ReMemBory.  Brilliant way to celebrate our tenth...:)  Let's start the talks with Joe!

What are some of your anthems?????  Share with me, please!

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Never enough

Life is good.

...but I always want more.

I'd like some heavenly guidance.  I've been asking, begging, and pleading for it for a couple months.

Especially so in the last few days.

I finally got some today.  Only it wasn't quite what I wanted.

I finally get an answer and immediately I'm basically whining (just like my kids, and I hate it when they do this!) that it's not enough.

*siiiiiiiigh*  Once again, Heavenly Father, I'm sorry.

Thank you for helping me to see more clearly.

Thank you for strengthening my faith.

Thank you for showing me that you ARE watching over my family, even when I start to wonder what's going on.

Thank you for being patient with me.

Thank you for showing me over and over and over again that you have plans for me and my family.  Plans that you understand better than me.  Plans that will lead to the best possible blessings that you can give us.

And thank you for blessing me with four sons who push me to be better and fill my life with smiles, shining eyes, hugs, kisses, laughter, and joy.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Thursday, Thursday

Today I am thankful for this:

Texas finally passed the bill I mentioned in this post.

(The inflammatory writing was annoying and the twisted arguments and tactics of the protestors still sadden me, but the bill passed.  Baby steps, baby steps (little Freudian slip pun there for you:)).)

For this:

And for this (I dare you to watch it without feeling any emotion):

I am grateful there are still many who are trying to protect life in this increasingly sexualized society.

I am grateful to know who I am and to belong to the largest women's organization in the world.

I am thankful for thought-provoking, tear-inducing, happy and uplifting videos. 

What are you thankful for today?

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Someone loves me

Anyone else out there look at other people's struggles and think, "I could never do that.  They are so strong." ???

I do.

But really, the fact is- if you were in their shoes, you'd likely be just as strong. 

I mean what else are you going to be?

If you suddenly find yourself single, or unemployed, or crippled, or, or, or...what else are you going to do but pick up pieces and trudge on?

I suppose you could always end your life.  But let's just not do that, eh? 


On a much smaller and less dramatic scale, I have been discovering some of my own strengths.  There have been so many times in the last few months when I just wanted to give up. 

I get tired.  Tired of being the cheerleader, tired of being the referee, tired of being the coach (my life is just one big sports metaphor), tired of being the maid, tired of being the judge, jury, and enforcer, tired of being the nurse, and now I'm tired of making this list.  You get the idea.

Life is draining.

But when I get to the point that I start thinking about just stopping, I (ever so thankfully) realize that life is not about me and someone would suffer if I dropped whichever metaphorical ball is giving me the most grief.  And so I keep going.

I keep going. Even when I thought, "That's it.  I can't do it anymore."  And when I make that choice to keep going, oddly enough I have the strength needed.  It works in every single aspect of life.

Funny ol' world, innit?

Anyway.  All that to say, I've been pushed to the wall so many times in the last couple months and always found it give once I've determined to keep going.

This morning I was faced with another wall. 

I glared at the wall.

I stuck out my tongue and kicked that stupid wall.

I leaned against the wall and moped at its existence.

And then I decided to do something productive, but different; just to change things up.  I cleaned out a long ignored cupboard.

In it I found the interview I'd done with my dad about his years in the Navy, drawings and doodles from five year old Jonzy-boy, the clippings from the twins' first haircuts that I thought I'd lost, and the notes from Al's and Goose's baby blessings that I also thought I'd lost (and kicked myself for so many times!).

Yeah, I cried.

I found the notes about ten seconds into the job.  I look for them every six months or so, the last search being two months ago.  As soon as I spotted the notebook, God told me, "there it is."  I gasped and snatched it then started thumbing through it to confirm if it was or not.  When I landed on the right page, the emotions flooded and that wall jumped back a few yards.

It moved further away with every lost item discovered.

It makes me so happy to get nods from upstairs.  I love reminders that Heavenly Father is aware of me and my silly struggles. 

Even though I wish it was bedtime now;)

Thursday, July 11, 2013


Holy cow, it's Thursday!

I missed last Thankful Thursday and since the baby is napping and the other boys are pretending to sleep in a blanket fort- it's quiet:)

And since I feel like taking a break from cleaning in preparation for yet another showing, here I am to blog about something I'm grateful for.

And today, that is baseball!

It's been the summer of baseball for us.  Baseball and keeping the house spotless have been what our days are planned around.  After the last few months, I'm a little worried about what life will be like when we have multiple boys in multiple activities...

Jonzy boy finally made it onto a good team, with a good coach this year.  The regular season was tons o' fun and ended well.  Then he got the chance to try out for the All Star team, landed a spot, and there was another month of baseball for us.

Last night, though, they lost their second game in the tournament.  That means the end of the season and no advancing to State.  Awwwwwww, man!

I am grateful for the last few months.  I love watching the games and watching my boy.  But what I'm even more grateful for right now is all that we're done with until next season.

No more finding ways to keep cool and hydrated in the blazing early evening hours.

No more packing snacks and listening to my boys pester me about when they can eat said snacks.

No more trying to keep track of the twins while keeping track of the game.

No more nursing in the car (though in fairness, I haven't had to do that since the regular season).

No more lugging boys, food, water, sunscreen, blankets, pop-up tent, chairs, stroller, camera bag, etc all over the place.

No more daily dealing with freeway drivers who have no idea what cruise control is.

No more listening to crazed parents debating obscure rules.

No more frustration at teenage umpires.

No more frustration at the lack of information for parents trying to figure out when to be where.

It's nice to have some time to just "take it easy" this summer.  (Now let's get this house sold and kick back into crazy-gear:))

Hooray for a great season of baseball with more ups than downs!

What are you thankful for today?

Wednesday, July 10, 2013


I used to get multiple comments about my age and/or my insanity having three boys every single time I went into public.

When I was pregnant with Trooper the comments almost stopped completely.  Shockingly so.

I suppose by that point, I looked like a lost cause.  A reckless and irresponsible teenager, draining the resources of my fellowman, hopelessly beyond reach of "logic" and "reason," and so not worth their time.

Because you can tell everything about a person's heart, intent, abilities, and life just by looking at them. 


Whatever the cause, it was nice to finally have some peace in public. 

It's clear that people are still wondering and even shocked when they see me and the boys, but at least they're quiet about it.

I still get some comments these days.  And most of them are fairly humorous.  Today I got a nice one at the store:

Cashier: "...so, how old ARE you?"

Me: "I'm about to turn ____." (no specifics here, remember?:))

Cashier: "I don't believe that.  You look 18."

Me:  "It's the truth.  You did just have my ID in your hand.  You want to see it again?"

Lady behind me: "No, you definitely look 18."

Me: "Well, thank you! I'm finally getting to the age where I appreciate comments like that."

Lady behind me's friend: "You're 18 and have THREE boys?!?!"

Me: "No, and there's four actually.  The last one is over there.  Goose get back here."

At which point I am ready to leave and she pats me on the shoulder with a look of pity and stutters, lost for words, "that's...that's..."

So I try not to laugh and interject with a smile, "Oh no, it's a great life.  Come on fellas, let's go."

It was pretty funny. 

And- I look 18!  Booyah, baby.