Thursday, October 29, 2009

Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for a simple life. My life is relatively free of complications, drama, unwanted and/or unexpected happenings, and hardship. And yet, I struggle sometimes...lots of times;)

But I am so grateful that through my hard times, I usually haven't had to worry about anything huge.

Writing this made me think of that Shaker song, "Tis the Gift to be Simple." While I've recently learned that it's a dance song and the word is "the gift" and not "a gift" I want to post the lyrics anyway because it's beautiful tune and the words are great, too.

'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free,
'Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be,
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gain'd,
To bow and to bend we shan't be asham'd,
To turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come round right.
-Joseph Brackett

What are you thankful for today?

Monday, October 26, 2009


Okay, anti-vaccinators, I'm beyond ready for you to stop viewing me a stupid sheep and horrible mother. I understand why you don't vaccinate your children. I understand why you choose to have a delayed schedule. What I don't understand is why my opposite opinion makes me an idiot.

I've done research. I've talked to the doctor in depth about this. I know there are toxins in vaccines. Thimerosal, MSG, formaldehyde, etc. Ew, gross, yuck, etc. There's also disease in vaccines! If we're going to get nit-picky about things, maybe we can talk about TSP in Cheerios? Yes, believe it or not, TSP is an ingredient in Cheerios. Never heard of it? It's a potent chemical substance used as a wallpaper stripper. Did you know that? Maybe I'm not such an ignorant idiot after all.

Really, there's so much stuff out on the internet that if you want to find "proof" that vaccines do more harm than good, you'll find more than your fill. And if you want to find "proof" that vaccines are beyond worth the risk, you'll find more than your fill.

I've concluded that following the immunization schedule recommended by the AAP is what we will do for our family. It's not what I would wish for in a perfect world. No, in a perfect world there wouldn't be diseases to worry about in the first place. In my near-perfect world wish, my kids bodies could be made immune to harmful diseases by merely eating a single carrot every week. But I don't live in my near-perfect world. In the world I live in I hate taking my kids in for shots. I pray extra hard for the three days surrounding "shots days" that they won't suffer any bad effects from them since it's my choice and not theirs.

I'm not an idiot. I do care about my children, probably much more than you do. Choosing to follow a vaccination schedule does not make me a bad mom. Please stop judging me and poorly for it and calling me a sheep; I get enough of that about my religion, but that's a whole 'nuther ballgame;)

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Thankful Thursday

Recently I stumbled upon an online forum about Mormonism. As the people who participate in this forum are, for the most part, good and kind people, I was drawn into reading through it. Several more discussions have since popped up about LDS doctrine on this forum. It's been interesting, disappointing, disheartening, and strengthening all at the same time.

It was interesting to learn about the things people think about the Church and it's members. It was disappointing to see that so many people believed the lies they've heard about LDS church members. It was disheartening to see how many good people have allowed Satan to harden their hearts against the Church. And it was so wonderful to see that most of the participants, members and not, could discuss this amazing religion in a respectful manner; the basic testimonies offered by some members were extremely refreshing when things started to stray.

But really really finding out just what people disagree with in my religion has, for lack of a better term, planted seeds of doubt in my head.

No, not like, "I'm not sure this is really true..." Try as he might, Satan has thus far been unable to crack my testimony. It's been getting firmer and stronger for 25 years, it definitely won't be an easy task for him to actually get me to doubt what I know to be true. I still would like to kick him in the pants for trying, though.

No, these doubting seeds are more like distractions than doubts. For example, when I read a scripture about a revealed truth the thought pops into my head, "Yeah, but people who don't believe this will just point to such-and-such a scripture interpreted in such-and-such a way and say that means this isn't true." Instead of allowing the Spirit to teach me in that moment that what I've read is true, my mind is busy thinking of how others refute it. Does that make sense?

Anyway, I am not happy with that, so in effort to push through it, I offer my basic testimony.

I know God lives. I know Jesus is his son. I know that I am his daughter and that he loves me more than anyone else does. I know that Jesus Christ is my savior, redeemer, advocate, friend, and my way back to our heavenly Father. I know that his church has been restored through the prophet, Joseph Smith. I know that his prophet today is Thomas S. Monson. I know that the things taught in his church are true. I know my prayers are heard and important. I know that, through the blessings of temple covenants and ordinances, my family can be together forever. I know I have been richly blessed.

I am thankful for this knowledge. I am thankful for the direction and peace that they bring to my life.

I think it all comes back to this. I can be thankful for my washing machine, sunshine on the mountains, food in the fridge, the sweet smiles on my sons' faces, etc. But really, the meaning is sucked out of those things for me were it not for this knowledge that I have.

What are you thankful for today?

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


I feel fine now. Happy with life. Fine with my situation and how things are going.

The weird thing is: nothing's different (as far as I can tell).

My dryer is still broken. My kids still won't listen to me. Everything that was combining against me last week is not bothering me this week.


It's funny what a little time to digest things and have some consistent daily scripture study will do.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Rough Patch, Thankful Thursday

I'm not very chipper lately. Last week I was in a funk and realized that I have been a huge slacker in my personal scripture study. Days when I study the scriptures in the past have always been happier days. So I re-committed to doing daily study again. It worked for a few days. And then I got slammed into an even bigger funk.

It was a bummer of a weekend. I don't even remember Saturday. Sunday was a bear with a highlight of some family coming over for the evening. Monday, hopes were high as we planned and executed a Fall Family Fun Day. But each high seemed so fleeting and each low seemed impossible to crawl out of.

Guess which days I didn't read my scriptures.

Tuesday was an oddity. I got up way before the boys and studied my heart out. But what a downer day it was! I could not shake the desire to do things only for me. I didn't do the me things, but that desire stuck right to me and took the joy out of pretty much everything I did do.

Things are looking up though. Wednesday was better than Tuesday, and Thursday's turning out to be okay. And I have HIGH hopes for Friday:)

I've been struggling a bit with God lately. One reason I do Thankful Thursday is so that I am regularly remembering how good I have it and the blessings I've been given. I do that for a few reasons; one being that I hope that if I feel and show gratitude for what I have that God won't feel the need to take things away from me. I know there are lessons to be learned beyond gratitude when a blessing is removed or denied, but I have yet to understand what I'm supposed to be learning these last couple weeks. I very much would like to just have an answer right now. But, as my heavenly Father knows, patience is not a strength for me and I suppose he's trying to teach me to have more of it.

Take, for instance, the minor yet frustrating issue of our dryer. Sunday night it worked, Monday night it didn't. Why? Why?!?!?!

Yes, it's a small issue, eternally speaking. An issue that, though possibly expensive, we can solve without immense hardship. But after everything that's been going on this just felt like a slap in the face.

And so, I will try to focus on the silver lining. I stress about the clothes dryer far too much. "Is lint caught in the exhaust?" "Is running the dryer going to end up burning down our house?" "How much money is this costing me to run?" Irrational stress, yes. But I can't help it. So, every once in a while I get the desire to chuck the dryer and line-dry our clothes. With the busting of our dryer (and the fact that our new house has a laundry room that does not make me think a spider will jump out at me every time I move in it) this possibility presented itself to me again. More than a desire, this time I'm actually really excited by the idea.

And so we are going to move forward with it. We'll string up an apparatus in the laundry room for the winter. And I'm going to try to figure out where in the world we can get a hold of one of those awesome "tree" things to put outside for when the weather turns pleasant again.

Bret wants to have a dryer as back up. And for good reason. My past track record in staying on top of the laundry is anything but squeaky clean. I'm off to find a cheap temp dryer on online classifieds to be our back up while Bret tinkers with our kaput dryer to see if he can fix it.

Isn't this exciting? Even in the dumb times, there's stuff to be thankful for. What are you thankful for today?

And any tips from the experienced dryer-less crowd would be appreciated.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Thankful Thursday

The tantrum fairy is gracing us with her presence today and I, for one, would like to give her a swift kick in the can and send her out the door.

That said, I am very thankful that I can take this "break" and remember what I am grateful for. Today I am thankful for anticipation. It makes life so much more exciting.

This evening I am looking forward to gathering with the women of my ward and perhaps starting to remember names with faces and make some friends. The anticipation of getting together with some gals tonight and removing myself from the tantrum fest at home is bittersweet. I want so much to "get away" but I feel so selfish for thinking that. And who knows, I may find that no one wants to talk to me tonight. Still, it should be an enjoyable evening.

I am also anticipating the Christmas season. While shopping for jeans for Jonz this morning, I couldn't resist the urge to walk down the Christmas aisles and check out the decorations. Jonzy got hold of something with a button and pushed it. It played a little Christmas song and I felt so happy thinking of Christmastime. I am extremely excited to celebrate for a solid month soon.

I am thankful for the happiness that these anticipations have brought me today and the fun I have anticipating other things in life. Good times, good times.

What happy things are you anticipating and what are you thankful for this Thursday?

Monday, October 5, 2009

Mother's heart- medical marvel

I don't know about you, but sometimes I wonder how my heart keeps on beating after all it's been put through.

I can't count how many mini-heart attacks I've had since the day Jonz became mobile. Since Al and Goose started moving on their own, I think the average number of mini-heart attacks per day is up to 12.

Everything seems to scare the tick right outta my ticker.

Every trip seems to be right toward a sharp corner or at the top of the stairs.

Every arm pulled back is going to send a toy flying into the head of a brother.

Every single time they pause going up or down the stairs I'm sure they're going to fall down them.

Every stumble flashes horrible thoughts through my head- head injury. Broken bones. Brain damage. Death.

And let's not mention this weekend when I brought all the boys into the open garage, turned to lift something out of the garage, thought "Lindsey, you can't not be looking at the boys for as long as it will take to get this out. That's asking for trouble. Put them back in the house, move this, THEN they can come out," turned back around to shepherd the boys inside only to see Al and Goose running feet from the street to pet a dog on the other side and a car coming far too fast for a family neighborhood. I think that one was worth fifty heart attacks right there. Not only did my heart suffer, my insides disappear, and my body become this super-human thing jumping, tripping, and flying over obstacles (how'd they get out here so fast?!?!?!) to get there in time, but my poor neighbor across the street about had a heart attack, too.

Seriously, how does this heart keep on beating when it has been forced to stop so many times?

Am I alone? Or is medical miracle something every mother is blessed with?

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for our waste removal service. Thursday is "trash day" in our new neighborhood. Only one out of the three Thursdays we've been here have I remembered to get the trash to the curb before I hear the trucks rumbling down the street early in the morning. For three+ years, trash day was Friday for me and I'm having a bit of trouble getting the new schedule ingrained in my internal calendar.

I am so glad that I only have to remember what day of the week it is and pull the cans to the street. That along with a monthly fee is all it takes for our garbage, recycling, and yard clippings to be taken away from our house. Oh how glad I am that I don't have to pack trash into my van with my kids and haul it to the dump. Or worse- I'm so glad that don't all have to have personal dumps in our backyards (though some people decide to do that anyway).

What a great service! Thank you, City!!