Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Made whole

Late last Friday night, Bret called me over to the window to see the amazing, moonlit view. I had already removed my glasses for bed and was too lazy to walk to the other side of the room to put them back on. So Bret offered me his.

I put them on and...nothing. His glasses made the large blurs of light into medium blurs of light and that was it.

I felt crushed. Seriously, it felt like the wind was momentarily knocked out of me. I feel like crying just remembering it. Then again, I've been a bit teary the last few days already. Dumb hormone shifts.

I forget how awful my vision is. Not because I don't notice the stark difference between my bare eyes versus my eyes with glasses or contacts in front of them. But because I forget that other people don't see like I do. I get fairly jealous of other people and their vision. I don't remember what it's like to see clearly without anything on my face or in my eyes. Quite the bummer, if you ask me.

It's times like these that I have to focus on what I do have going for my eyes.

I live in a day and age when having bad vision is correctable.

I have the means to own glasses and contacts specifically prescribed for my eyes.

My eyes do still work, with the proper help.

Colors are just as vibrant for me as anyone else (at least, I think they are...).

A few years ago, I had a conversation with three year old Jonz about this very subject. While putting my contacts in one morning, Jonzy asked what I was doing. I said, "I'm putting my eyes in." Of course, this was right in the middle of the "why" phase so I gave further explanation (as simple as I could make it given the particular audience) that my eyes are broken and those little pieces of plastic helped my eyes to see better. I needed to put them on my eyes so I could see.

Upon hearing that Mommy's eyes were broken he was a little unnerved. So I went on to say that it was okay that my eyes are broken. Because of Jesus they wouldn't be broken forever. When I was resurrected I'd have perfect eyes again.

He doesn't remember that conversation. But every time I start to get a bit down because I can't see without help, those few moments with my son pop back into my head. I remember how great it felt sharing such things with my son and how it was true then and it's true now.

I'll have whole eyes and perfect vision again.

Just another awesome part of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. What an amazing plan:)

No comments: