Yes, a rant. Yes, ranting on such things is childish. Yes, I am usually bigger than this.
Yes, I would appreciate it if you gave me a break...I need one every now and again;)
This is a random* post combining annoyances I have on three fronts: the facebook drive-by (e.g. Status-"Just got the best news of my life!!!:):):)<3<3<3" Comment- "Yay!" Comment- That's great! What is it?" Comment- "You deserve good news. Love ya, gurl!" Comment- "Oooo, I wanna know! txt me."), those who dish out advice opposite of what they live, and drama queens.
Funny thing is, if a person frequently does one of these they're 98%** more likely to also be frequent offenders on all three counts.
It is for interactions with these kinds of people that I sometimes wish I had a little pocket book with a page for each offender. On each page I would have written my five favorite direct quotes (with dates and references for context in case of disagreement) from said individual. Then I could use it for my own prideful and impossible purposes of showing them the error of their ways and leading the way back to being people of rational thought and action.
For example. The next time someone tries to pull me into the latest episode of the soap opera that is their life, I can whip out my book, flip to their page, and say-
"Remember when you said back in September, 'Don't bring your drama to me. High school ended years ago and I'm done being around people who bring me down with their immaturity?' That's what I'm thinking right now. Just sos ya know."
Oooorrrrr....next time I see or hear someone say or do something unkind to their significant other or child: Out comes the book, page found, and-
"Remember when you said, 'Cherish the ones you love, you never know when they'll be gone?'"
Putting together and using such a book would probably just get me punched in the face. I know I wouldn't like someone to use my own words like that in my less-than-ideal life situations.
But still...the idea won't die.
Hmm, maybe I should make a book for myself of things I say but don't always live up to...might save me from punching well meaning people in the face:)
*Yes, this post was inspired by a facebook drive-by of wise life-advice posted by a drama queen. All three in one place just screamed, "Rant on blogger- go!"
**Lindsey is in no way responsible for incorrect statistics made up in her mind on the fly based solely upon her personal observations and conversation with like-minded family and friends...even though she's most likely right (ah! there's that pride again...).
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Thankful Thursday- Dear Parents,
Step up.
The line was crossed a LONG time ago.
Before the world succeeds in leading you any further away from it, turn around and RUN back to that line. Don't pause; hurl yourself back across that line for the sake of your children (and by extension- you).
The line I'm talking about? Parent-led vs. child-led.
You know, letting the child tell or show their parents when they're ready for something instead of the parents deciding.
It actually sounds great- no bully parents forcing a child to do something he/she is not ready for.
And I agree. Parents should not be bullies and should not expect more from their children than what they are developmentally ready for.
But part of a parent's job is to determine when their child IS ready. If you follow the child's lead- they don't get what they're ready for or what they need, they get what they want.
For example, a toddler is full of emotion; emotion they don't understand. A parent could follow their child's lead and conclude that when their child screams it's because they're young and coddle them some more.
OR- as the parent they can teach their child not to scream and show by example or explanation (depending on the comprehension level of the child), what is being felt, how to control it, and what the best way to act is in such situations.
Or even simpler, how about this: bedtime.
Nuff said;)
It seems that the much of the growing generation is being raised by child-led parents. The effects are already seen.
Let's compare some examples.
Example 1- I just read a story about a mom and her six year old son. This six year old boy recently told his mom that he wanted to kiss boys. She wrote all about how she wouldn't damage his feelings by telling him that such things were sinful and he would rot in hell if he did. So many gay people are treated that way and they knew how they felt when they were that young. Can we imagine saying such hurtful things to a six year old?!?! Peace, love, tolerance people!...She also mentioned in passing how her son idolize a gay character on the popular show Glee.
..............................To which I say,
Sister. Aside from the fact that you let your six.year.old watch a show chock full of teen sex and all the filthiness and content he is exposed to from that (which he is developmentally NOT able to fully comprehend and understand thereby confusing the cheese and crackers right out of him and screwing up his future relationship potential)- aside from that, think for a minute what you're NOT teaching your son. You're not teaching him right from wrong, you're not teaching him how to think critically and analyze the thoughts that come through his mind, you're not teaching him that he can trust you to lead him down the most successful paths, you're not teaching him boundaries! (And I hope, but doubt, that parents know the value of boundaries...I think I'll post about that sometime, too.)
Example 2- Here I will share a personal example where I admit something and ask that you don't mock or think less of me because of this temptation I deal with.
I am a kleptomaniac. In the loosest sense of the word and only in thought, not in deed. As a child if I saw something I wanted, or that simply could be taken without notice, I would want to take it for my own. BUT, my parents have always taught and set the example that stealing is wrong and I am not to do it. I can honestly only think of one time in my young life where I did actually steal something. And when guilt finally got the best of me and I fessed up to my mom, she didn't shame me or tell me I'd rot in hell for my sin. She reiterated what she and my dad had already taught me and facilitated my return of the object. Plain and simple, yet so effective.
Even now, as I near 30, I still get those thoughts in my head (I could totally take that and not get caught). We're talking as large as grand theft auto here, people; this is not a passing, inconsequential temptation. Eternal thanks goes to my parents, though, because I have a deep-seeded understanding that stealing will not make me happy and it is strong enough to stand against those temptations.
Compare those two. One boy will most likely grow up to be someone who scorns my family and our belief in traditional family, perhaps going so far as to torment my children, spray paint my garage door with hate-speech, or worse. And this girl, once a potential thief, is now a solid community citizen who just wants her family to thrive in her care.
Parents, please step up and lead your children. It does make a difference.
Only part of your job as a parent is to love your child no matter what. The rest is to teach them, prepare them to face the world and come out happy (and by happy I don't mean "having received and experienced only what and everything that they wanted." I mean just that, happy; joyful even!).
Experience is what we have to offer to our children. After all, what- really- is the difference between parents and children? Time. As parents, we got here just a bit earlier than they did. In that time that we've been here we've learned and experienced and can turn around and offer that to our children when they get here.
As an experienced nuclear physicist, would you let a three year old tell you how to do your job? Only if you want to cause a massive, deadly explosion because all those buttons looked so colorful they just had to be pushed. Or perhaps have a fifteen year old girl teach your business college class on conflict resolution? Because getting all your friends to ignore and spread rumors about that colleague who criticized your latest report really is the best way to solve the issue, isn't it?
It doesn't make sense in those situations and it doesn't make sense in parent/child situations. The one with the knowledge and experience does the leading and the teaching, not the other way around.
As parents, we lead, show, tell, and teach our children because we know and understand better than they do.
Yes, take into consideration the child's age and ability to understand. Yes, be kind and gentle instead of forceful and cruel.
You can do that AND lead your children. The two are not mutually exclusive.
I am so thankful for my wonderful parents and for the hard work, sacrifice, blood, sweat, tears, and love they put into setting me firmly on the best path. And I'm thankful for a Heavenly Father who blessed me with everything I need to be happy.
What are yoooou thankful for today???
Sincerely,
Lindsey
The line was crossed a LONG time ago.
Before the world succeeds in leading you any further away from it, turn around and RUN back to that line. Don't pause; hurl yourself back across that line for the sake of your children (and by extension- you).
The line I'm talking about? Parent-led vs. child-led.
You know, letting the child tell or show their parents when they're ready for something instead of the parents deciding.
It actually sounds great- no bully parents forcing a child to do something he/she is not ready for.
And I agree. Parents should not be bullies and should not expect more from their children than what they are developmentally ready for.
But part of a parent's job is to determine when their child IS ready. If you follow the child's lead- they don't get what they're ready for or what they need, they get what they want.
For example, a toddler is full of emotion; emotion they don't understand. A parent could follow their child's lead and conclude that when their child screams it's because they're young and coddle them some more.
OR- as the parent they can teach their child not to scream and show by example or explanation (depending on the comprehension level of the child), what is being felt, how to control it, and what the best way to act is in such situations.
Or even simpler, how about this: bedtime.
Nuff said;)
It seems that the much of the growing generation is being raised by child-led parents. The effects are already seen.
Let's compare some examples.
Example 1- I just read a story about a mom and her six year old son. This six year old boy recently told his mom that he wanted to kiss boys. She wrote all about how she wouldn't damage his feelings by telling him that such things were sinful and he would rot in hell if he did. So many gay people are treated that way and they knew how they felt when they were that young. Can we imagine saying such hurtful things to a six year old?!?! Peace, love, tolerance people!...She also mentioned in passing how her son idolize a gay character on the popular show Glee.
..............................To which I say,
Sister. Aside from the fact that you let your six.year.old watch a show chock full of teen sex and all the filthiness and content he is exposed to from that (which he is developmentally NOT able to fully comprehend and understand thereby confusing the cheese and crackers right out of him and screwing up his future relationship potential)- aside from that, think for a minute what you're NOT teaching your son. You're not teaching him right from wrong, you're not teaching him how to think critically and analyze the thoughts that come through his mind, you're not teaching him that he can trust you to lead him down the most successful paths, you're not teaching him boundaries! (And I hope, but doubt, that parents know the value of boundaries...I think I'll post about that sometime, too.)
Example 2- Here I will share a personal example where I admit something and ask that you don't mock or think less of me because of this temptation I deal with.
I am a kleptomaniac. In the loosest sense of the word and only in thought, not in deed. As a child if I saw something I wanted, or that simply could be taken without notice, I would want to take it for my own. BUT, my parents have always taught and set the example that stealing is wrong and I am not to do it. I can honestly only think of one time in my young life where I did actually steal something. And when guilt finally got the best of me and I fessed up to my mom, she didn't shame me or tell me I'd rot in hell for my sin. She reiterated what she and my dad had already taught me and facilitated my return of the object. Plain and simple, yet so effective.
Even now, as I near 30, I still get those thoughts in my head (I could totally take that and not get caught). We're talking as large as grand theft auto here, people; this is not a passing, inconsequential temptation. Eternal thanks goes to my parents, though, because I have a deep-seeded understanding that stealing will not make me happy and it is strong enough to stand against those temptations.
Compare those two. One boy will most likely grow up to be someone who scorns my family and our belief in traditional family, perhaps going so far as to torment my children, spray paint my garage door with hate-speech, or worse. And this girl, once a potential thief, is now a solid community citizen who just wants her family to thrive in her care.
Parents, please step up and lead your children. It does make a difference.
Only part of your job as a parent is to love your child no matter what. The rest is to teach them, prepare them to face the world and come out happy (and by happy I don't mean "having received and experienced only what and everything that they wanted." I mean just that, happy; joyful even!).
Experience is what we have to offer to our children. After all, what- really- is the difference between parents and children? Time. As parents, we got here just a bit earlier than they did. In that time that we've been here we've learned and experienced and can turn around and offer that to our children when they get here.
As an experienced nuclear physicist, would you let a three year old tell you how to do your job? Only if you want to cause a massive, deadly explosion because all those buttons looked so colorful they just had to be pushed. Or perhaps have a fifteen year old girl teach your business college class on conflict resolution? Because getting all your friends to ignore and spread rumors about that colleague who criticized your latest report really is the best way to solve the issue, isn't it?
It doesn't make sense in those situations and it doesn't make sense in parent/child situations. The one with the knowledge and experience does the leading and the teaching, not the other way around.
As parents, we lead, show, tell, and teach our children because we know and understand better than they do.
Yes, take into consideration the child's age and ability to understand. Yes, be kind and gentle instead of forceful and cruel.
You can do that AND lead your children. The two are not mutually exclusive.
I am so thankful for my wonderful parents and for the hard work, sacrifice, blood, sweat, tears, and love they put into setting me firmly on the best path. And I'm thankful for a Heavenly Father who blessed me with everything I need to be happy.
What are yoooou thankful for today???
Sincerely,
Lindsey
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Thankful Thursday, Slacker week
The week between Christmas and New Years Day is one of my favorites of the year.
There's minor difficulty associated with this week. The abrupt death of Christmas magic that is suddenly lacking when listening to the music of the season or watching Christmas movies always astounds me. And then there's the struggle to think of all I have accomplished this year and being excited for the new year versus the pull to feel like a continual failure and fear the new year.
But aside from that, this week is great!
Bret calls it National Slacker week. I think that's a brilliant name for it.
There's a leisurely vibe hanging in the air.
No school.
Sleeping in.
The boys are engrossed with new toys and games. And with new toys and games come expanded imaginations and new pretend scenarios. (I could watch these guys pretend and play for hours.)
I barely cook because there's so many leftovers from Christmas that need to be eaten and enjoyed.
I stay up late with my husband eating goodies and watching any Christmas movies we haven't had a chance to watch or taking in a new video one of us received as a gift. (Though I do have to battle some guilt at keeping him up so late when he has to keep a normal work schedule...)
And though the major holiday has passed, there's still the exciting anticipation and preparation for New Years Eve and fun with friends. I'm so excited!!
I LOVE this relaxed week and one last hooplah before getting back to the daily grind.
I'm so thankful to live a life that can include National Slacker Week.
What are you thankful for today?
There's minor difficulty associated with this week. The abrupt death of Christmas magic that is suddenly lacking when listening to the music of the season or watching Christmas movies always astounds me. And then there's the struggle to think of all I have accomplished this year and being excited for the new year versus the pull to feel like a continual failure and fear the new year.
But aside from that, this week is great!
Bret calls it National Slacker week. I think that's a brilliant name for it.
There's a leisurely vibe hanging in the air.
No school.
Sleeping in.
The boys are engrossed with new toys and games. And with new toys and games come expanded imaginations and new pretend scenarios. (I could watch these guys pretend and play for hours.)
I barely cook because there's so many leftovers from Christmas that need to be eaten and enjoyed.
I stay up late with my husband eating goodies and watching any Christmas movies we haven't had a chance to watch or taking in a new video one of us received as a gift. (Though I do have to battle some guilt at keeping him up so late when he has to keep a normal work schedule...)
And though the major holiday has passed, there's still the exciting anticipation and preparation for New Years Eve and fun with friends. I'm so excited!!
I LOVE this relaxed week and one last hooplah before getting back to the daily grind.
I'm so thankful to live a life that can include National Slacker Week.
What are you thankful for today?
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Thankful Thursday
What a lovely time of year this is.
Sun shining on snow.
Beautiful music.
Warm smells in busy kitchens.
Cookies!
Wrapping gifts with fun paper.
Classic, feel-good movies.
Brief reprieves from illness.
Soft blankets and warm houses.
Giddy kiddos.
Songs e-ver-y-where.
Extra gatherings with family and friends.
Reading wonderful stories of Jesus and wonderful Christmases with my family every night before the boys go to bed.
Haltingly plunking out Christmas tunes on the piano, as far as my limited "skillz" will let me.
Walking down the stairs and smelling the Christmas tree.
Lighting up the house and seeing all the lovely lights in the neighborhoods.
Life is good:)
Here's the exciting conclusion to one of my favorite Christmas movies. Skip to about 5 minutes in and then click on "part 11" when this one finishes. Always always makes me smile!
What are you thankful for today?
Sun shining on snow.
Beautiful music.
Warm smells in busy kitchens.
Cookies!
Wrapping gifts with fun paper.
Classic, feel-good movies.
Brief reprieves from illness.
Soft blankets and warm houses.
Giddy kiddos.
Songs e-ver-y-where.
Extra gatherings with family and friends.
Reading wonderful stories of Jesus and wonderful Christmases with my family every night before the boys go to bed.
Haltingly plunking out Christmas tunes on the piano, as far as my limited "skillz" will let me.
Walking down the stairs and smelling the Christmas tree.
Lighting up the house and seeing all the lovely lights in the neighborhoods.
Life is good:)
Here's the exciting conclusion to one of my favorite Christmas movies. Skip to about 5 minutes in and then click on "part 11" when this one finishes. Always always makes me smile!
What are you thankful for today?
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Thankful Thursday *cough*sunday*cough*
After my twinners were removed from my body, due to some complications and such, there was a period of six+ months that sitting down or standing up involved much pain and careful movement.
In the years since, I will regularly think (usually after flopping myself on the couch or jumping out of a chair) how wonderfully blessed I am to have a healthy body.
As I've healed from this latest sickness, I realized that it had been longer and longer between those kinds of thoughts. And I don't recall thinking anything like it since the summer at least.
Perhaps this latest bout, among lessons of patience and faith, was a reminder to be grateful for my health and my family's health.
Swallow.
Did it hurt? No? Then you are one lucky person!
Take a deep breath through your nose.
Possible? Catch the delightful scents of Christmas, to boot? Lucky you!
Did you have the strength to shower AND get dressed today? To make a meal for your family? To stand and walk across the room?
Good health is an amazing blessing!
I am taking great pleasure in swallowing without pain and having the strength and energy to be Mom again. And with antibiotics to kill this sinus infection, soon I will enjoy the smells of Christmas, too.
It's the little things:)
Merry Christmas! Happy late Thankful Thursday!
What are you thankful for today?
In the years since, I will regularly think (usually after flopping myself on the couch or jumping out of a chair) how wonderfully blessed I am to have a healthy body.
As I've healed from this latest sickness, I realized that it had been longer and longer between those kinds of thoughts. And I don't recall thinking anything like it since the summer at least.
Perhaps this latest bout, among lessons of patience and faith, was a reminder to be grateful for my health and my family's health.
Swallow.
Did it hurt? No? Then you are one lucky person!
Take a deep breath through your nose.
Possible? Catch the delightful scents of Christmas, to boot? Lucky you!
Did you have the strength to shower AND get dressed today? To make a meal for your family? To stand and walk across the room?
Good health is an amazing blessing!
I am taking great pleasure in swallowing without pain and having the strength and energy to be Mom again. And with antibiotics to kill this sinus infection, soon I will enjoy the smells of Christmas, too.
It's the little things:)
Merry Christmas! Happy late Thankful Thursday!
What are you thankful for today?
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
"That I can tell you in one word:"
"Tradition!"
One of the reasons I love Christmastime so much is that it is so full of traditions.
Every year, I can expect the same wonderful things to happen and share in them with those I love.
My favorite traditions all take place on Christmas Eve.
I make reuben loaves to go along with our traditional potato soup for a lovely dinner.
We play games, we chat, we eat way too much good food.
And then before the littlest ones head to bed, the best Christmas stuff happens. The whole motley crew gathers into one room and either Bret or my dad (depending on who we're spending Christmas with) reads the Christmas story from the scriptures. We sing Christmas hymns and carols throughout the reading, too. I love singing together:)
I particularly love doing this with Bret's family. As there are more kids, Bret has devised ways to keep their interest longer. We wrap small gifts and each child gets to unwrap a present and read part of the story to the rest of us. Then Bret finds a story that illustrates in a simple way what Jesus has done for each of us and reads that, too. For example, one year this was the story.
We usually end up singing any and all other Christmas songs we can think of before the youngsters head to bed.
It's a beautiful night! One of my favorites in the entire year.
What is your favorite Christmas tradition?
One of the reasons I love Christmastime so much is that it is so full of traditions.
Every year, I can expect the same wonderful things to happen and share in them with those I love.
My favorite traditions all take place on Christmas Eve.
I make reuben loaves to go along with our traditional potato soup for a lovely dinner.
We play games, we chat, we eat way too much good food.
And then before the littlest ones head to bed, the best Christmas stuff happens. The whole motley crew gathers into one room and either Bret or my dad (depending on who we're spending Christmas with) reads the Christmas story from the scriptures. We sing Christmas hymns and carols throughout the reading, too. I love singing together:)
I particularly love doing this with Bret's family. As there are more kids, Bret has devised ways to keep their interest longer. We wrap small gifts and each child gets to unwrap a present and read part of the story to the rest of us. Then Bret finds a story that illustrates in a simple way what Jesus has done for each of us and reads that, too. For example, one year this was the story.
We usually end up singing any and all other Christmas songs we can think of before the youngsters head to bed.
It's a beautiful night! One of my favorites in the entire year.
What is your favorite Christmas tradition?
Monday, December 12, 2011
Perspective
I'm upset.
Whatever bug it is that we've been stricken with was formulated by Hades himself. There seems to be no end to it's ability to change and torment us.
Perhaps we get sick so often because I refuse to have the patience to be content with it 90% of the time...
Anyway, I am upset.
In going through my blog roll, I saw that Jocelyn is hosting a Christmas-themed Book of Mormon blog hop.
"What a better way to banish my upset-ness (however momentarily;)) than to share one of my favorite scriptures!?!?," thought I.
To start, back story-
Five years previous, the prophet Samuel announces to the people that the Savior of the world will be born in five years in the land of Jerusalem. As a sign, so these people would know that the Son of God had indeed been born on the other side of the world, there would be no darkness for a day a night and a day. The sun would go down and rise, but there would be no darkness.
Many people believed Samuel. Many didn't.
Those who didn't believe mocked those who did. They also had the audacity to say, "If the sign doesn't happen by such-and-such a date, we're going to kill all of you crazy believers."
Needless to say, the believers were getting pretty anxious and scared, but watched and waited faithfully.
Nephi, a prophet and of course a believer, was none to happy to see such evil among his own people (the unbelievers wanting to kill the believers).
So Nephi went out and prayed. He prayed for his people, he prayed for the believers, he prayed ALL day.
And so we come to the end of my ridiculous summary and to my favorite verses-
Makes me cry. Every time.
Can you imagine?
Thousands of years of prophets telling people that Jesus is coming.
Your life and the lives of those you loved being threatened by people who refuse to believe the truth.
Knowing that tomorrow! the Redeemer of all mankind was to be born.
I am so grateful for the Book of Mormon and the testimonies of Christ that I read in it. I am so thankful for this touching story of the very first Christmas in the ancient Americas. And I am looking forward to being healthy with my family and enjoying this beautiful, wonderful, happy season of the year together.
Thank you, Jocelyn, for this chance to share:)
Whatever bug it is that we've been stricken with was formulated by Hades himself. There seems to be no end to it's ability to change and torment us.
Perhaps we get sick so often because I refuse to have the patience to be content with it 90% of the time...
Anyway, I am upset.
In going through my blog roll, I saw that Jocelyn is hosting a Christmas-themed Book of Mormon blog hop.
"What a better way to banish my upset-ness (however momentarily;)) than to share one of my favorite scriptures!?!?," thought I.
To start, back story-
Five years previous, the prophet Samuel announces to the people that the Savior of the world will be born in five years in the land of Jerusalem. As a sign, so these people would know that the Son of God had indeed been born on the other side of the world, there would be no darkness for a day a night and a day. The sun would go down and rise, but there would be no darkness.
Many people believed Samuel. Many didn't.
Those who didn't believe mocked those who did. They also had the audacity to say, "If the sign doesn't happen by such-and-such a date, we're going to kill all of you crazy believers."
Needless to say, the believers were getting pretty anxious and scared, but watched and waited faithfully.
Nephi, a prophet and of course a believer, was none to happy to see such evil among his own people (the unbelievers wanting to kill the believers).
So Nephi went out and prayed. He prayed for his people, he prayed for the believers, he prayed ALL day.
And so we come to the end of my ridiculous summary and to my favorite verses-
And it came to pass that he cried mightily unto the Lord all that day; and behold, the voice of the Lord came unto him, saying: Lift up your head and be of good cheer; for behold, the time is at hand, and on this night shall the sign be given, and on the morrow come I into the world, to show unto the world that I will fulfil all that which I have caused to be spoken by the mouth of my holy prophets.
3 Nephi 1:12-13
3 Nephi 1:12-13
Makes me cry. Every time.
Can you imagine?
Thousands of years of prophets telling people that Jesus is coming.
Your life and the lives of those you loved being threatened by people who refuse to believe the truth.
Knowing that tomorrow! the Redeemer of all mankind was to be born.
Amazing, amazing, amazing!
I am so grateful for the Book of Mormon and the testimonies of Christ that I read in it. I am so thankful for this touching story of the very first Christmas in the ancient Americas. And I am looking forward to being healthy with my family and enjoying this beautiful, wonderful, happy season of the year together.
Thank you, Jocelyn, for this chance to share:)
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