If there were grades for social graces, I would get a big fat F.
I'm so single-minded when I'm out and about (where are the boys? 1-2-3- good, let's get from point a to point b, 1-2-3, almost there, 1-2-3, stop four year old from running into street, 1-2-3, grab other four year old before he walks into the wall, 1-2-3 boys check....etc. etc. etc) that I make little room in my brain for other stuff that pops up.
That, and I need a few moments of concentration to process. Just a few moments is all I ask and the cogs in my brain will click into place. With pregnancy though, I need more moments than usual.
But I rarely get those few moments in the rush of life (both because life is rushed and I tend to rush along the slower things to make more time for the more rushed things).
Social grace, propriety, and manners usually fail me in such situations.
Case in point:
Took the boys to the library after picking Jonz up from school today (and stopping back at the house to get shoes for my barefoot twins). Wanted to get in and out quickly because I had laundry that needed hanging up soon before we miss the good light and breeze.
After getting into the library, Al manages to walk into the back of a woman (kid is fond of looking anywhere but the direction he's walking:)). She starts to apologize and turns around, recognizes Al and says, "Oh, Hi! How are you?" Then she looked up at me and my pregnant self and says something along the lines of, "Hi! Oh, how are you doing? And you're expecting another little one!" with a big, sweet smile on her face.
Then there's me. Train of thought goes something this, "Dang, this lady has me confused with someone. 1-2-3. I have no idea who you are. Got to pick up my books on hold before the boys pick something out. Wait, you look familiar. 1-2-3. Shoot, I should know her. 1-2...AH, oh whew 3. I've got to get that laundry on the line. Baseball; why is baseball ringing a bell? Man, I'm starving! 1-2-3. Let's get out of here so I can get home and eat something!"
All while making mindless responses like "mm-hmm, we're pretty excited. Yep, nice to see you." and walking away thinking "yeah, must have been a case of mistaken identity."
It wasn't until we were outside the library, headed to the car and loaded down with books and dvds that the cogs finally slipped into place.
Little league! Her son was on Jonz' team two years ago! We DO know each other.
And now I have guilt. I don't remember her name and we only crossed paths for a couple months two years ago, but good heavens Lindsey! She is, and always was, genuinely nice to me and the boys. I couldn't take two seconds to slow down and remember or even say, "I'm sorry, I know I should know you, but I just can't place...oh! Baseball! It's so nice to see you, how are you?!" instead of my disingenuious and awkward "mm-hmms" and lack of eye contact?!?!?
Gaaaaaaaah. Fail, fail, fail.
Goal #7,693 for the Improvement of Lindsey- worry less about point a to point b and take time with the people around me, whether I know them (or remember them) or not.
So I'm sorry kind woman from baseball who in all likelihood doesn't read here. I do remember you, I do appreciate your smile and the time you take to talk to me. Your boys have grown so much I didn't reconize them, either, but they look wonderful. Thank you for being more observant and having more social grace than me. I hope that life is treating you well and that I can cross paths with you again.
Please tell me I'm not the only socially inept one out there!